Thirteen narcissists in a room.
One occupies the head of the table,
gently fondling his first published novel,
Milk Toast,
"Alright," professor says,
He produces an assortment of newspapers
and instructs the class to find story ideas
A photo portrays teenagers
I pass the paper.
"Time's up!"
Then it hits me,
**First published in The American Dissident
which the university press declares
"a wry and energetic romp"
"a wry and energetic romp"
chronicling the misadventures
of an associate professor
struggling with success
and an arranged marriage gone awry.
He admires the glossy cover of his book
while the rest of us huddle in groups of four
struggling with success
and an arranged marriage gone awry.
He admires the glossy cover of his book
while the rest of us huddle in groups of four
to discuss dialogue construction.
"Good dialogue should sound real,"
"Good dialogue should sound real,"
someone offers.
"It should advance the plot,"
"It should advance the plot,"
says another.
They turn to professor.
They turn to professor.
He nods.
"Alright," professor says,
"here comes a timed exercise
to help you think more creatively."
He produces an assortment of newspapers
and instructs the class to find story ideas
in the headlines.
"You have six minutes."
I am handed a paper
I am handed a paper
and encounter a piece covering
a group of Japanese students
who built a world-record-breaking,
who built a world-record-breaking,
one-hundred-foot-tall structure
made of Legos.
The Japanese celebrated
made of Legos.
The Japanese celebrated
with a parade of streamers,
fireworks,
and musicians.
The fireworks grew out of hand,
and the wooden platform
supporting their creation
caught fire.
Attempts to control the blaze failed.
The structure collapsed.
A photo portrays teenagers
standing in horror and weeping.
The headline reads:
The headline reads:
JAPANESE LEGO-TOWER RECORD
DESTROYED BY FIRE.
Yet, those students─
the months of planning and labor,
their monument to God knows what
disappearing in flames.
I pass the paper.
Others scribble furiously,
pencils racing.
"Time's up!"
Then it hits me,
in what professor calls
"the divine, creative spark."
I get the hell out of there
and hustle to the Student's Union Bar
before the story
gets away.
**First published in The American Dissident
**Illustration by Morgane Xenos

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